mom-mode post #219 – on time to process

September 28, 2012 § 3 Comments

I had a few minutes to spare this Friday, so I thought I’d join Five Minute Friday again!

Today’s word:

Grasp.

O has started to act up this week. Little naughty behaviors, a few temper tantrums. The attention-getting type, you know?

In the midst of all the packing, I was trying to grasp what was this all about. How could I help him? Then it hit me. Just as I, a grownup (I guess), am trying to understand and make sense of all the emotions a big change entails, so is my 2-year-old. Without enough words to express it, to grasp it, his ways tell me he needed some grace and perhaps some time to sit down and process through it.

So we made a countdown calendar. Nothing Pinterest worthy, just some pictures on a page. “Mommy and daddy were extra busier these days”, I said. We are getting ready for our big plane ride to Gram and Gramps!”

My little toddler surprised me with some newfound eloquence: “I ready mommy. I go on de plane. I ready to Gram and Gramps.”

Truth is, we both needed some time to process.

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mom-mode post #217 – on wiww to Starbucks

September 26, 2012 § 6 Comments

We have so much going on with our upcoming move/trip, I haven’t had much desire to get ‘made up’ these days.

I’ve been keeping it simple with leggings, sweatshirts and ballet flats.

Here’s what I wore to Starbucks/errands this morning!

outfit deets:
Shirt – gift from my sister (well, more like stolen from her)
Leggings – Mango
Flats – Deichmann

(I have encountered a good problem… I lost some weight so all of my pants are a bit too loose. Leggings have become my trusty companions. I hope I can carve out some time to alter some pants soon!)
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Running errands in our city means lots and lots of walking, flats are a girl's best friend.
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linking up with the pleated poppy

mom-mode post #218 – on another transition

September 26, 2012 § Leave a comment

Hey there friends!

Just thought I’d write a little note to let you know that things will be a a little quiet around here. We are getting ready to go to the States in the next week or so. Needless to say there’s not much time for blogging left.

I do hope to get back into blogging stronger than ever once we settle into things in America. I hope to bring you more outfit posts and more essays about becoming a mommy.

Enjoy this lovely beginning of Fall!!!

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mom mode post #216 – on falling for Fall

September 17, 2012 § Leave a comment

I can’t believe I’m about to write this. But friends, I am not longer a Summer girl. My whole life I have been a lover of all things summer: beach, flip-flops, late nights, daylight savings time. However in the past few years I started to notice a shift, an indication if you will, that summer was no longer my favorite season. It has taken me this long, but I’m finally ready to admit it, I can hardly wait for Fall! Maybe is the fact that I no longer live on a perfect island off the south fo Brazil, maybe is my current place in life, or my current stage, I don’t know. But here are a few things that have gotten me craving for some delightful Fall weather and leaves falling:

1. The return of weekly baking in my kitchen

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2. Hot beverages
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3. Candy. Corn.
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4. Fall walks, especially since we will be in the Blue Ridge Mountains this Fall!
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5. Hoodies. Ah, I love me some soft hoodies!
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6. Watching Fall TV under cozy blankets
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I’m also ready to wear dresses with boots, wearing my hair down (and not in a ‘do because of the heat), tights, cozy cardigans… Yep, I think I’m officially a Fall girl from now on. Goodness, it feels strange reading that out loud.

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mom mode post #215 – on a letter to my 15-year-old self

September 14, 2012 § 2 Comments

This week many bloggers have written letters to their teenage selves, and I thought I’d join in. You can read more about it here. This was a great exercise for me to talk to that brokenhearted girl of 15 years ago. I sometimes don’t realize how much I’ve buried this part of my story. It’s a beautiful tale of pain and redemption though. It may be time to start putting this part of my story on paper. 🙂

Dear 15-year-old me,

Oh honey, my eyes are filled with tears just thinking about the pain you (we) are going through this year. Let me tell you something dear, it gets better. This unimaginable pain you feel right now is redeemed and the wounds in your heart are healed by your ever-loving Savior. Keep holding onto Him, He is indeed Your Rock, and you’re about to discover what true intimacy with God is. I’m excited for you in this aspect. The lessons you will learn this year, be them emotional or spiritual, will take you on a an incredible lifelong journey of letting God be the controller of your life. However hard this year is, you will one day come to the conclusion it was all worth it. You will learn to cherish this as part of the beautiful narrative God is writing in your life.
This year you will also learn the pain of rejection. Your best friend will start dating and stop hanging out with you when you need her the most. Commit to forgive her now, don’t carry this grudge with you. Don’t let this decide how you face new friendships from now on. Be willing to be vulnerable in your friendships, darling. It might be painful sometimes but if you aren’t being real and open, it just isn’t worth it. This friend will go through many a trial later in life, she will finally understand the pain you are going through with your parents’ marriage crisis.
You will be thrilled to know that the Lord answered your many prayers and counted your many shed tears: Your parents marriage is strong today and your family is still together. Stronger than ever. They will go through many a battle still. In the end, a few months before your own wedding day, your daddy will ask for your mom’s forgiveness. He will apologize for the pain he caused you and your sisters and he will come back home to never leave again. Your parents and your sisters will become a very valuable support network as you move away. You will love spending time and talking with them. Right now all you want to is to get away. Trust me though, when you do get away you will miss them muchly and dearly.
I have more good news for you: All these dreams you have in your heart? They all come true. Yes, I’m not crazy. You serve an awesome God who heard every prayer you prayed. You will get to see the world, even more than you imagined. You actually don’t even live in your own country anymore. You become a citizen of the world, you speak many languages and you love every minute of it all.
God blesses you with the man of your dreams. It will be a fairytale-like whirlwind romance. Your marriage will be one of happiness and much love and respect. Your husband will be so trustworthy. No need to fear darling, God redeems this part of your life too.
He blesses you with the sweetest little boy ever. I know now you’ve decided you don’t want to ever get married, let alone become a mommy. Trust me, your marriage will be a balm to your wounded soul and motherhood will be the sweetest unexpected gift ever.
Trust your older self when I tell you, life is just about to get so much better and so much happier for you. Soon you will be singing along Mary J. Blige: ’cause we are celebrating no more drama in our lives’. Well, there will still be drama, but now you know who you can count on and the Lord will give you a wonderful support network that will carry you through some of the rougher times that will come your away.
Keep bending your knees in prayer, keep going to scripture for refuge. The Lord will keep you under His wings in the next turbulent years of your life. You will be safe with Him.

One more thing, keep making art. Don’t ever stop. It’s your life’s passion. Draw, write, paint. Learn how to sew. He made you for this.

Oh and no matter what people say, you are beautiful. And by no means or standards are you fat. Let’s get this straight now, ok? Keep swimming, working out and eating well. Block out the voices that tell you aren’t athletic enough. Your body is way more powerful than you think. Trust me on this one.

Keep dreaming dear one.

Love,

Your 30-year-old self

Unfortunately I don’t have any pictures of my 15-year-old self. Gotta make sure I ask my mom to scan some for me.

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mom-mode post #214- on keeping the focus and digging deeper

September 14, 2012 § 4 Comments

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Today I’m giving this 5-minute Friday another go. Here are my best five minutes on the word focus:

It was sometime after I turned thirty. I realized my life was in desperate need of real focus. I wasn’t getting any younger, it was time to get my behind in gear and fulfill a lifelong dream: Be one of those people who wake up early and by the time people most people are filling up their first cup of coffee, you have worked out, read your bible, put a load of laundry in.
I decided it was time to focus on the things I want to be in life, be the example I want to set for my son. Block out the distractions. Facebook, blog feeds, other people’s ideas. Focus on what I believe the Lord had tugged at my heart for some time.
After much prayer, one Sunday night, I finally sat my alarm clock for 5:30 am. The first few mornings were rough.
Sixty days later, I have lived to tell the story. I’ve completed a round of the Insanity workouts, a bible study, prayer and I feel much more focused throughout the day. No longer chugging down tons of caffeine just to keep me going.
Turns out that just a bit of focus in the morning was what I needed to turn my days (and my life’s goals) completely around.
I mean, once you tackle Shaun T. first thing in the morning, there aren’t many other obstacles in my day I feel I can’t handle.
I am that much stronger. That much more focused.

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mom-mode post #213 – on going to the movies for the first time

September 13, 2012 § Leave a comment

There are so many wonderful things about being a parent, and one of my most favorite things is to get to see my child experience many ‘firsts’. First smile, first steps, first trip to the movies.
It wasn’t a planned outing. I don’t think I had ever thought about the frist time I’d take O to the movies. My friend called asked if we wanted to come along. I, without giving it too much thought, excitedly said yes.
O and his buddy were thrilled to get to sit on booster seats to watch the “big TV”, wearing cool glasses. The movie was Brave, in Turkish, no subtitles. This didn’t seem to faze my trilingual child, although I’m pretty sure I missed a few of the jokes. He didn’t take his eyes off the screen (and the delicious snacks we brought along) until the first half of the movie. Here in Turkey, like in plays, they do intermission in movies too. The husband and I have gotten so used to this, when we go to the movies in America or in Brazil, we desperately miss being able to go to the potty or fill up on snacks without missing parts of the movie.
After intermission things got a little tricky. O had to go potty but was struggling with the public restroom, it was getting close to his nap and he got a boo boo on the way back from the bathroom. Alas, he was still super excited about it all. He has been sword fighting and playing pretend bears ever since. And talking about the movie he saw on the big TV.
My favorite part? The parts that got him a little scared, he jumped on my lap and I got to cuddle with my usually never-stop-moving-toddler for a loooong time. I was in mommy heaven. 🙂

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20120913-150721.jpgcrappy iPhone pictures of my big boy in front of the movie poster and inside with his buddy and glasses, but it was too dark. Should’ve brought a better camera. 😦

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